Stalking My Memories

I deleted the tumbl app off my phone today. It’s...interesting, I suppose, how many mixed feelings I have about this purge. On the one hand, there is spite: I will stick around until I get bored with being repeatedly booted, and I have a REMARKABLE amount of patience for stupid games like that.

On the other hand, there’s this sensation permeating everything. It’s not quite grief, it’s not quite fear, it’s not quite exasperated exhaustion. All those are in there, but I don’t know what to call it other than ‘melancholy’ and that’s not quite right either.

I know that online spaces are ephemeral. I spent the last two weeks preparing for a possible deletion, and to be quite honest I was pretty sure that it would happen.

And here it is.

I’m tired in a way that kinda surprises me, but it’s familiar. I keep flipping from a snarky, almost jovial ‘welp, that’s a thing’ and then remembering tumblr specific fic that now is only in my files, followed by an emotion best conveyed as ‘ARGH. I have to do something about that!’

Concordance.

Defiant Refrain.

Commander Kenobi.

Gods, I want to go looking and there is no easy way to search my archive, it’s just all plopped down there, and best I can do is literally skim backwards and hope I remember when things were.

::scrubs face:: I just don’t trust Tumblr to not disappear out from underneath me again. I think what I need to do is an actual, schedule-time-for-this-every-day project where I’m digging back through the archive and migrating everything. Cross-post things, toss as much onto AO3 as I can. Maybe set up some kind of cross-index via spreadsheet or worksheet or something, I don’t know.

If anyone wants me to post any particular things, or for me to search for reblogs of your particular things while I’m doing this, please let me know.