UFF - untitled
Mar. 12th, 2010 04:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
norcumiIt's Friday, so heaven help me I'm posting something that's been kicking around on my computer for awhile. I know how the story goes, for the most part, so it's agonizingly slow to get on the page, and none of it reads right to me. It sounds so damn stilted and off. I also cannot for the life of me figure out what to call the damn thing. Based upon characters I play with ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lynati and quindarprime, though they get passing mention at best.
It wasn't the pile of gold coins sitting neatly in her palm. It wasn't the stacks of silk cloth sitting on the counter, nor even the fact that it was exactly what she needed to complete the latest phase in her healer's training.
It was the fact that the package sitting in the mailbox had her name on it, and only her name. Even the auction house had an obligatory stamp they made a token effort to place upon their parcels, making it clear who the sender happened to be. This was the seventh package that Lashana had received in less than two months, and every last one had been bursting with gold and sometimes items; precious objects of value if not necessarily sense. Few had been as magically potent as the huge warhammer that had been in the second package, or as strange as the little robot pet that seemed to be some sort of fad, but every last thing had been useful in some way.
And she still had no bedamned idea where any of it came from.
Mysteries. Bah. The troll sneered and placed the coins down firmly enough that the stack spilled over into an untidy heap. Enough 'a this! Thunder Bluff was not the place for answers – she knew that easily enough. Everything here was polite, ritualistic, and Hinoba's somewhat simple ways aside, damned if she'd ever met a tauren who didn't retreat into the formalities of tradition when push came to shove. No, she needed to go somewhere a little more... direct. Her tusks twisted into a smirk as she tossed the items into her pack – the gold going into its own private little pocket, separate from her own funds – and headed for the flight master.
The inn at Ratchet had, among other things, a resident postmaster. The goblin slumped against the mailbox, straw hat tipped over his eyes, with only raucous snores indicating this wasn't just another indiscreetly disposed body. Shana snorted and nudged him with a toe, jumping back as the snores broke off abruptly, the goblin springing to his feet and brandishing a cudgel. “Hey, hey! What's the big idea?”
Seeing the rogue standing ready, hand on hip and near a faintly glowing dagger with eyebrow raised and obviously unimpressed, the goblin tried to pull his dignity together. “Whatta want?”
“Information,” she snapped back before tossing the package wrapping at the goblin's feet. “Ev'rybody knows you have yer hands in th' mail system. Don't these be needing somethin' about where they came from?”
The goblin was trying to look as unruffled as she was, so he barely bothered to nudge it with his toe. “Unless someone's tossing around some shine to keep it hidden. So what?”
“How 'bout you be findin' out for me?”
“I'm busy,” he grumped, crossing his arms.
Shana rolled her eyes. “You want a tip, you mean.”
He tried to hide his interest, but nonchalance was clearly not an area of his expertise. “Hey doll, you said it, not me. Whatta got?”
“Two things,” she purred before lunging. “One,” she declared, gently moving the pointy end of her dagger along the top of the goblin's nose, “we don't be seein' if the glow here is strong enough to come out y'ears when I put this in one'a y'eyes. Two....” She pulled away and sheathed the dagger, making the motion showy and slow as she reached around to her pack. The stack of gold coins, so helpfully provided in the last mystery package, sparkled nicely in the light as she held it out towards the goblin who went from shivering to salivating in a heartbeat. “A third a'this now, a third when you find me who sent that, and a third when I can get to 'em.” She let a little more than a third of the coins trickle into her off hand, and she held it out slowly. “How's that be soundin'?”
“You gotta deal!”
end content
lynati and quindarprime, though they get passing mention at best.It wasn't the pile of gold coins sitting neatly in her palm. It wasn't the stacks of silk cloth sitting on the counter, nor even the fact that it was exactly what she needed to complete the latest phase in her healer's training.
It was the fact that the package sitting in the mailbox had her name on it, and only her name. Even the auction house had an obligatory stamp they made a token effort to place upon their parcels, making it clear who the sender happened to be. This was the seventh package that Lashana had received in less than two months, and every last one had been bursting with gold and sometimes items; precious objects of value if not necessarily sense. Few had been as magically potent as the huge warhammer that had been in the second package, or as strange as the little robot pet that seemed to be some sort of fad, but every last thing had been useful in some way.
And she still had no bedamned idea where any of it came from.
Mysteries. Bah. The troll sneered and placed the coins down firmly enough that the stack spilled over into an untidy heap. Enough 'a this! Thunder Bluff was not the place for answers – she knew that easily enough. Everything here was polite, ritualistic, and Hinoba's somewhat simple ways aside, damned if she'd ever met a tauren who didn't retreat into the formalities of tradition when push came to shove. No, she needed to go somewhere a little more... direct. Her tusks twisted into a smirk as she tossed the items into her pack – the gold going into its own private little pocket, separate from her own funds – and headed for the flight master.
The inn at Ratchet had, among other things, a resident postmaster. The goblin slumped against the mailbox, straw hat tipped over his eyes, with only raucous snores indicating this wasn't just another indiscreetly disposed body. Shana snorted and nudged him with a toe, jumping back as the snores broke off abruptly, the goblin springing to his feet and brandishing a cudgel. “Hey, hey! What's the big idea?”
Seeing the rogue standing ready, hand on hip and near a faintly glowing dagger with eyebrow raised and obviously unimpressed, the goblin tried to pull his dignity together. “Whatta want?”
“Information,” she snapped back before tossing the package wrapping at the goblin's feet. “Ev'rybody knows you have yer hands in th' mail system. Don't these be needing somethin' about where they came from?”
The goblin was trying to look as unruffled as she was, so he barely bothered to nudge it with his toe. “Unless someone's tossing around some shine to keep it hidden. So what?”
“How 'bout you be findin' out for me?”
“I'm busy,” he grumped, crossing his arms.
Shana rolled her eyes. “You want a tip, you mean.”
He tried to hide his interest, but nonchalance was clearly not an area of his expertise. “Hey doll, you said it, not me. Whatta got?”
“Two things,” she purred before lunging. “One,” she declared, gently moving the pointy end of her dagger along the top of the goblin's nose, “we don't be seein' if the glow here is strong enough to come out y'ears when I put this in one'a y'eyes. Two....” She pulled away and sheathed the dagger, making the motion showy and slow as she reached around to her pack. The stack of gold coins, so helpfully provided in the last mystery package, sparkled nicely in the light as she held it out towards the goblin who went from shivering to salivating in a heartbeat. “A third a'this now, a third when you find me who sent that, and a third when I can get to 'em.” She let a little more than a third of the coins trickle into her off hand, and she held it out slowly. “How's that be soundin'?”
“You gotta deal!”
end content
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no subject
Date: 2010-03-14 05:15 pm (UTC)Not sure if you'd like feedback, but if so:
* "Her tusks twisted into a smirk" Do they do that?
* A few long sentences that could really use breaking up into some shorter ones.
Keep up the good work!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-15 01:20 am (UTC)And I adore feedback! Much obliged!
* smirking - um.... you know.... Huh. It struck me as a good turn of phrase earlier, but the more I think on it, I don't know. Hmm.
* longer sentences - Erk. I think I know at least one place you might be talking about. Have to make sure I poke at that later.
Thank you again!!